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Technic[Bot]
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Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#1 Post by Technic[Bot] »

Honestly I am not much of a writer, I really am not. But ever since getting into this comic i got, the old creative juices flowing and before i noticed i had created a small piece of text. That was gonna be the end of it just something for the dark depths of my google drive account. But although it is by no means related to the comic it was "inspired" by it. I imagined someone here might find it interesting. So decided to go and publish this little thread.
I don't not usually write but when i do (pun intended) i write mostly short stories, as it is very hard for me to keep a plot going , This next one is one of them and it is unlikely to be continued. But if i ever get some "inspiration" and it is relevant to the forum I might post other short tales here, to keep everything nice, self contained and mostly NOT spammy.

As you can tell I
So my first piece: No title as I am terrible at naming thing, you can look at my username for that.
A fair warning thought this is not particularly high literature and Ensglish is not my first language and it shows. If after all that you are still interested be my guest
Spoiler!
Excerpt from a newspaper from the capital of the Republic of ILLEGIBLE. A job posting for the new railroad.
August 12 1927


Attention all!
The National Railroad Company is looking for you!
Due to the opening of the new industrial train station at the Guadiana Valley we are offering jobs and lodging for anyone with demonstrable experience.
Available jobs are:
Freight Handler
Machinist
Trainmaster
Railroad Engineer
Logistics expert
Ticket Salesman
Railroad operator

The rest of the ad is missing

Official Republic Radio Addressing the 28th anniversary of the victory over the monarchy:

...Here i thank all those patriots who gave their life not that long ago to bring down the oppressive royal regime that plagued this great country for centuries. And paved the way for the creation and development of a modern democracy.
Not even 30 years ago the battle of the [static] valley took place, where the might of the republic crushed the last royal citadel, forcing the deposed royal family to surrender.
And now after decades of civil unrest the country is getting on track for a bright future. Foreign investors like Mr Pratt from Pratt & Co. Steelworks, are now opening factories all across our beautiful country. Creating jobs and opportunities for all of our people to…

Bulletin board from [missing].
April 15 1928
Vulpine Sighting over the town.

On the past weeks several citizens have reported to the Civil Guard various occurrences of Vulpine sightings all across city.
We would like to remind you that the city has always been near an important Lupine settlement and our relation with them has always been cordial, and we used to have Lupine visitors all the time before the war started. So there is nothing to fear about these recent sightings
However we have got reports about missing chickens, looted silos and warehouses. The department recommends keeping any valuables under key and keep livestock inside their stables at night.
There have been no reports of tools or money missing in any case but changing your safe combination and securing your tool shed is never a bad idea.
According to our experts this is expected season for vulpine activity and we expect them to be out of town before long.
Until then:
Be Safe.
Police department and Civil Guard.

Another post from the same bulletin board.
April 16 1928

Errata:
In a previous post the department misidentified the local sightings as Vulpines, a more detailed investigation revealed that the they are Lupine not vulpines.
The department apologizes for the mix up. In any case for all intents and purposes they are the same thing other than that same precautions apply.
Be Safe.
Police department and Civil Guard.

Handwritten note, under the post:
Of course they are Lupines you idiots! There have never been vulpines in this part of the country!


Railroad operator letter. Addressed to her boyfriend back in the city
May 1928

-Dear Matthew.

Please don’t freak out. You remember I told you how there is no light from my house to the station right?
Every day is crossing a dark road, as I am the first to arrive to the office. And i rarely have any problem I really don’t.
But i do need to tell you about this tiny incident that happened yesterday:
I was going my usual route minding my own business when I heard like something was walking behind me. I turned around to check, but there was nothing.
And before you think anything. No i am not hearing things, I am not crazy! Anyways The noise continued almost halfway to the Station.
Then i felt this thing breath in my neck. This time I turn around and it was one of those Lupine things.
It was all furry and ugly and it stole my backpack!
Fortunately I was carrying that knife you gave me, and made them back off, they were actually three!!!. Sadly I wasn’t able to recover my backpack. And my lunch was there. So i spend the whole day hungry…

Rest of the letter is missing

Diary entry from local Machinst. Riley “Rex” McArthur: Railroader/ machinist.
June 18 1928.

Dear Diary: I know i do not talk to you as much as i should but i need to get this out of my chest and i Am out of whiskey. That was one hell of a night...
Earlier i was reading in my room. When I heard them, Lupines, lurking around the garden and front yard.
Those Lupines keep getting into town at night to steal stuff. I usually don’t give a damn about it since I have the common sense to use locks. But tonight a big crashing noise scared me out of my sofa.
I took my grandad shotgun and went outside. A trio of Lupines were stuck on the remains of my shed. I had spent the whole winter repairing that piece of crap and those suckers tear it down in a minute.
They were even laughing! The gall of those things. A bucket of paint fell on one of them and he was now green, so i guess they had something to laugh at. But that was my paint too.
“What do you want here!” I yelled at them.
“Get out of my property!” I continued.
They stopped laughing at stared at me,perhaps afraid? No matter I decided to teach them a lesson I took aim and, just my luck, a fourth one tackled me from behind.
Alas i got the last laugh. I managed to shot before falling. It was not a clean or direct shot but I got one of them.
The other 3 rushed to it, leaving me in the dirt. From my not so vantageous position i watched as they tried to help their friend. Who was, mind you, very much alive. I have no idea what they were saying. I cannot speak that language but i did not need to.
“Save yourselves, leave me behind” must have been something like that. The Lupine in question, a female one for the matter, was still stuck on what was left of my shed and bleeding.
At this point I had enough I stood up and shot again. This time, as usual really I am not a good shot. I failed miserably but the loud bang convinced the trio to left their friend behind.
I got closer, I was not gonna let this [censored] get away. But when I saw the thing cowering under the moonlight. Whimpering and , I assume, begging for her life. I could not bring myself to shot.
Look, she was terrified of me, she was stuck inside a wheel in the remains of a half-assed shed crying and shaking in fear, covering his face with her arms. Slowly bleeding out. That is no way to go.
I noticed she began to faint, I was surprised she managed to stay conscious for that long. Now she was harmless and despite my best judgement I pried the wheel open and took her inside. I did not have much time so I called my pals: The veterinarian and the physician. “Between the three of us we should be able to do something for her”- Or so i thought.
I send word to that gal at the civil guard. She owes me a favor, that might come in handy.

So is she gonna make it?-
“She lost a lot of blood” - A gal in a white coat, a doctor, answered, while stitching the Lupine side.
“What did you shot her with man? It is like you were trying to shred her” - A guy with a grey overall asked, typical veterinary outfit, he was dressing the Lupine wound on her right thigh. The shot hit her on her side, damaging her torso, arm and leg, and some of the buck blew her ear off.
“I am surprised it missed her lungs and most important organs, but still...”
“We are not trained on her physiology or anatomy, we cannot do much more than patch her up and hope for the best”
“Why are you helping her?” - A lass with police uniform asked from the back of the veterinary clinic- “I know these two have a reason, the vet is a furball lover and the doc here has some weird oath to keep, but you? You hunt on your spare time, why help this thing?”
“From the point i took the shot she became my responsibility, whether she lives or dies is now my fault. And i feel sorry for her”
A day had passed and the machinist had not been able to get the image of the pleading Lupine out of his head. He was a hunter on his free time, not a particularly good one, but a hunter nonetheless, Yet killing that Lupine, right there like that felt incredibly wrong for him. He even felt like crap about taking that shot, for what? Some kids messing his mostly dead garden?
“Always the noble hero right?” - The officer retorted- “Wait is it moving?” Yes she was, squirming under the doctor, the vet and the machinist grip. A cornered canid was always something dangerous.
“Oh my god. it is gonna kill us all” The until now collected officer lost his mind and hid under a desk. Trembling in fear at the sight of the awakening Lupine.
“Give her whiskey”- The vet sentenced “Are you crazy?” The doctor objected
“Well if you rather use morphine and guess the appropriate does that does not kill her be my guest”

Diagnostic sheet found at local clinic

Ordinary diagnostic sheet. Has a human figure drawn to the left but someone drew a tail, hears and a muzzle over the figure with a red pencil.
It reads:
Patient: Jane Doe
Species: Lupine
Sex: Female
Diagnostic:
Multiple gun injuries on the right side of the body. Small caliber buck removed from arm, leg, torso and abdomen. Missing piece of right ear.
Multiple lacerations and bruises on the back wood splinters removed from her.
Dislocated ankle paw lower limb.
Foreign bodies were removed and wounds were cleaned and disinfected. Lower limb dislocation reduced and limb immobilized.
Due to safety reason medication has been restricted, no opioids administered. Used alcohol for sedative purposes.
Prescription:
Non-steroidal and no-opioid painkiller will be used once the patient wakes, if needed. If possible dressing must be changed daily and wounds disinfected regularly. Antibiotics will be administered as a podromic measure.

“She is waking up” our brave officer exclaimed while hiding behind the desk. It took her awhile but the young lupine managed to sit on her improvised bedding, clutching her right side. She looked lost, confused, disoriented and in pain, after all they were light on the medication. She also seemed unable to notice her “hosts” standing outside her “room”.

“She must, be thirsty” The doctor commented, and she was, as soon as she found the water bowl she drank it. They half expected her to go down and drink like a wolf, not to pick it up with her good hand.

“Should we try to”-“No, we better not startle her, for her own sake” They watched her for a while as she regained her bearings, still oblivious about them.

She eventually stood up and stumbled toward the doors. She tried to open it and slowly realized she was locked inside. The reality of her situation stuck her hard. She fell to her knees whimpering and crying.

“What do you expect, for all she knows we captured her to butcher her or sell her” The doctor kneeled beside her outside the enclosure and reached for her shoulder through the cage bars. the Young Lupine recoiled but did not backed away
“Hello sweetheart, you are safe I am a doctor, we are only trying to help you” She used a soothing and melodic voice to which the lupine responded positively. “Can you understand me?” The lupine nooded. “Good I need to ask you some questions, don’t worry they are easy”

The doctor started her routine questionnaire, “Were you in pain, Do you know who you are” etcetera. Meanwhile the vet stood impassible next to the machinist.
“I am not used to talk to my patients like that, at least I do not expect a response” He idly commented
“I imagine...” The railroader answered


The sound of the railway man snapped the Lupine attention from the doctor, she turned to see what was the source of that familiar voice. And her face filled with horror as soon as she saw him. She backed away as far as her enclosure let her trying to hide under her bed, whimpering.
“As if i needed to feel any worse about this” The railwaymen added.
“Oh yes i forgot you are the victim here” the doctor retorted
“Look i am sorry. I should not have shot you” that sounded better in his head.
“Listen we are trying to help you now, just be still and the doctor will heal you right”
“You are not helping” the doctor had a point, the machinist scared the young Lupine out of her mind.
“If he keeps like this she is going to open her stitches, all that work for nothing” The vet commented
“I have an idea, i brought it for us but she needs to calm down, and we can share some” The machinist left the room and returned shortly with a roasted chicken.
“So that is why my oven was on, go figure” the vet said.

The smell of the poultry calmed the poor thing. She approached the front of her cage sniffing. The enclosure had a small hatch in front, a way to get stuff in and out without risking and attack.
“I will give you some ok?” But as soon as the machinist opened the hatch the lupine reached out a took the whole thing out of his hands. She then began to devour it, bones and all.
The trio back away from the cage as she continued to “attack” the chicken. The whole room filled with the sound of chewing and bones breaking under the lupine sharp teeth. Still under the desk the policewoman was about to faint.

After mere 5 minutes the whole bird was gone, fortunately her mood had improved, she finally stopped crying and was wagging her tail while licking the tin were the chicken was cooked, and her fur. By some miracle her bandages kept clean.

“So what are we gonna do with her” The machinist asked
“We? I am sorry when you brought her to us i imagined you had a made 2, no at least 3 plans for her” the vet answered
“Don’t fight or she will cry again” The doctor objected “look we will keep her around until she heals, then we will let her go back to her town right?”

“I am afraid i can’t let you do that” The policewoman said, after regaining some of her composure.
“She was caught trying to steal from the city and damaging private property. I cannot let her walk away just like that. Besides now someone can finally tell us why are there Lupines getting into town stealing stuff, not that these fleabags need any reason”.
“Meaning?” the doctor asked in a dry tone
“Meaning i am gonna toss her into the dungeons until we figure this whole mess out!

-”You can’t send me to jail!!”
The four of them turned around and stared silently into the cage. They did not know a Lupine could speak their language so well.
So that was that...
Before i go i want to explain why i wrote this if you are still here that is. Don't worry is much more interesting that my story!
Spoiler!
Back in the early 1920's my great grandfather worked on the railroad on a very rural part of the country. As such electric lighting was still not a thing so he had to cross a very dark area every morning to get to his job. He used to tell that from time to time he felt something followed him. What was that? Acoording to him Nahuals.
What is a Nahual i hear you ask? Well in mexican folklore a Nahual is a person who can shapeshift into an animal or something like that. Imagine Raine from the comic, however unlike Raine who mostly is harmless and adorably awkward a Nahual main hobbies consist on killing cattle, poultry and kindnapping/killing people. At the end of the day they are part witches and part werewolf.
My great grandad also used to tell that sometimes at night he had to come out of his house brandishing his shotgun so the damn beast would let him sleep.
So i took those weird stories and mismatched them with the Twokinds idea of a world with both humans and non humans living in it and what you read is what came out.
There are three things that motivate people: Money, fear and love.
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PanClovek
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#2 Post by PanClovek »

I :heart: it, good read, the story is interesting and well written. Yeah it's noticable that english isn't your first language, ( it ain't my first language too ) but you could of proof read it and checked some words online. Two things I'm wondering is from what kind of perspective are we reading the story ? A guy that found some old stuff and an old recording ? God ? A ghost ? Is it supposed to be like in a movie with different writings appearing on the screen etc. ? Also in the diary entry the author seems to remember what each person said word by word ? Is he supposed to have a good memory or it's not a part of the entry ? What i'm saying is you could of added some titles or symbols to let the reader know when it's not a part of the entry but some kinda scene. Same thing with the diagnostic sheet, one could say the latter writings are part of the sheet.
I didn't notice it at the first read though, so no biggie ... I'm probably just nitpicking, it's a nice little story, reminds me of the twilight zone, do you plan on continuing it ?

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Technic[Bot]
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#3 Post by Technic[Bot] »

PanClovek wrote: Thu Dec 13, 2018 3:35 pm I :heart: it, good read, the story is interesting and well written. Yeah it's noticable that english isn't your first language, ( it ain't my first language too ) but you could of proof read it and checked some words online. Two things I'm wondering is from what kind of perspective are we reading the story ? A guy that found some old stuff and an old recording ? God ? A ghost ? Is it supposed to be like in a movie with different writings appearing on the screen etc. ? Also in the diary entry the author seems to remember what each person said word by word ? Is he supposed to have a good memory or it's not a part of the entry ? What i'm saying is you could of added some titles or symbols to let the reader know when it's not a part of the entry but some kinda scene. Same thing with the diagnostic sheet, one could say the latter writings are part of the sheet.
I didn't notice it at the first read though, so no biggie ... I'm probably just nitpicking, it's a nice little story, reminds me of the twilight zone, do you plan on continuing it ?
Many thanks. My original idea was to present the story on a epistolary fashion where all could be told as a collection of documents, diaries, transcripts and recordings, like if someone found a bunch of documents in an attic or at a goverment building. Since i generally struggle with keeping a coherent storyline over time i figured it would be an easier way to present the characters, the world and the plot. However over halfway thorough writing it i realized it was in fact harder and slower than i expected. So i defaulted to a more traditional way at the end of the story.
This is adapted to the forum, the original "manuscript" is written on google docs and there i can insert horizontal lines as separators to differentiate between "chapters/documents". Moreover at one point i planned to write the whole thing in Latex a typesetting language. this would allow me to create several different styles for each "document" on the story. However that is way harder than it sound so never went ahead with that idea.
Sadly it is unlikely that i will ever continue it. I am by no means a writer and I have real trouble with the long term dependencies required to create a full length story. Maybe i will write more "short-stories" set in this same world, if i ever find the time, and if that is the case i will post here. But i would not bet on it.
Again thanks for your interest!
There are three things that motivate people: Money, fear and love.
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Technic[Bot]
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#4 Post by Technic[Bot] »

So I had this weird idea in the back of my head for quite some time. Hope you enjoy it even if just a bit. It is basically Twokinds fanfiction so i dediced to share it here.
I did add an explanation section in case my writing is not clear enough to get the story across. 🙃
I call it TwoNews!
Spoiler! TwoNews
Been inside home for two months now. Netflix got canceled but at least still
got my job... for now

Wonder if the is anything good in TV...

[Static] ... The 10th anniversary of Tom Foods Holdings! Check you local chain
for discounts and promotions! [Jingle]

[News Jingle] And after that short commercial break we are back at our regular
programming.

A slender fox lady sits in the screen. She looks professional and educated maybe
it is because of that journalism degree she is always so keen on mentioning or
maybe simply the large amount of money the network spends on makeup artist and
scenography.

[More news jingle] Today on our analysis section. We will discuss the cultural
phenomenon of today: The fast food tycoon take on the country foundation story.
Simply titled Twokinds. For this we have professor Nessa Schmidt head of the
history department at the National University of Lyn'knoll.

Boring...

Glad to be here again Rebecca- The female wolf replied. who despite her tenure
still looked pretty young. One has to wonder is she is as young as she looks or
if it all was TV magic.

That PhD gal looks nice, might heard what she has to say.

Now that everyone is on lock down they finally ran out of stuff to talk on the
news. Not that they are particularly interesting normally.

So for all the people living under a rock. Twokinds is the brainchild of
Fast-food mogul Tom Finsbach. Owner of Tom Foods Holdings one the country
largest conglomerate of restaurant franchises. He owns darlings such as Tom's
homemade donuts, Draco Burgers and Tom's Pizza one of the oldest pizza
franchises in the country.

He started his business with a simple pizza parlor back in the 70's and via an
incredible business acumen in a couple years he had pizzerias all over the
country. And he never has stopped growing.

Always a fan of films and art he has spent a considerable amount of money
funding and producing all sort of art from movies to even comic books. His most
successful venture to this day is Twokinds a re-imaging of our nation foundation
history.

The show has now been running for 5 years now and is on its 15th season. And
despite having one of the highest ratings of TV it is not without controversy.

Will this vixen let the professors talk? Unlike her they may say something
interesting!

Isn't that right professor Schmidt?

Finally!

Of course Rebecca the show has indeed taken quite a lot of "artistic
liberties" and not everyone is pleases with the results.

Leaving casting aside there has been contention both from movie critics,
academia and the general public about the portrayal of certain characters. For
example Natani.

That is a very interesting case. Rebecca, the lupine professor continued, we
know from historical records and presential accounts for example by Queen Reni.
That such person nor anyone matching that description or role existed in the
early days of our Nation. The character of "Nathaniel" seems to gradually appear
over the years on retelling of the actual historical facts. That should be no
surprise to anyone as we teach that on 5th grade history, but a lot of people
seem unaware to it.

Unfortunately Historical records show that Keith never recovered from his first
wife death in the Basitin isles and that he never married. Even after he and
Trace managed to...

[Heavy static]

Come on! Piece of junk, work!. I just serviced you last week

... And died before his 40-45th birthday with no known relatives. Quite young
for someone his species.

Quite a sad ending for our national hero. The presented said.

That is exactly why I think the character of Nathaniel appeared over the years,
people wanted to give Keith the happy ending he deserved.

[chuckles]

On the first record of the character around the 1440 he was simply a Basitin
body guard for the ambassador general. But by the early 1600's he was portrayed
as Keith's lupine best friend after leaving the isles. Only until the 1800 was
he was gender swapped and we got "Natalia" from that is a straight line to the
1960's movie...

[Static]

Damn piece of [censored]!

...where she is depicted as Keith romantic partner. And now 60 years later we
have Natani from Twokinds.

That is one of the best movies ever made. Timeless classic. Isn't that right
Prof. Schmidt?

That is my favorite childhood movie!

As most people I really like that movie.

Yet unlike Twokinds almost everyone seems to like it. Why do you think is that?

That is a very good questions. I doubt there has anything to do with actual
historical accurracy. Yes there are a lot of inacurracies:

The human king of the time was not assassinated by the wolves, he
died shortly after peace was signed. Legacy State is located far north, not in
Edinmire by any measure and to this day is very hard to find portal doors
anywhere let alone in a bar in Edinmire, to name a few.

And some people have described the whole show as "lewd historical fiction
written by 'overexcited teens;" Then presenter added. That is one of the few
descriptions I can actually mention here live.

That is definitely not my area of expertise, the professor interjected, but I do
recognize my college Professor Meyer quote.

In any case I think the issue is representation not historical accurracy. We all
have this idea, mainly from the 1960 movies, of who and what were Trace, Flora,
Keith and Nat.

That is right! give me back Natalia!

Our understanding of the early days of our country have improved dramatically
over the past few decades. And that has challenged our ideas about these
historical figures.

The show also challenges our preconceived ideas. But due to its "artistic
liberties" it takes It may got far beyond comfortable for some people.

Like Natani and Keith relation?

Exactly. that pairing does make some people uncomfortable. Again our own biases
show.

But at the end of the day I think that is what the real message should be
about. The professor Trace and the others fought for...

[static]

Not even gonna bother now

...So that we all can get along together, live together and love whoever we
want to regardless of race or anything else. That is why I think at the end it
has the royal Seal of approval, the Silverlock Institute also endorses it and
even the Legacy State backs it despite none of those institutes having any say
on the show production and...

[TV power off]

To mellow for my tastes, I will go to sleep now
Spoiler! Explanation
So you probably are thinking: "The hell i just read" Yeah sorry about that.
So in a couple of sketches it has been suggested that the whole comic is simply a TV show filmed yes on Mekkan but several hundred years after the actual comic story is happening.
So i decided to take that idea to its final conclusion. Tom is actually a Fast food Tycoon and produces Twokinds, a historical fiction, for the fun of it.
The story is simply about a man watching the news in a future Mekkan while on lockdown for unkown reasons, Google the year of the post to figure my inspiration for that. And tunes the news channel to stave of the boredom.
Here the TV anchor a fox discusses with a wolf about the show.
I try to give small and organic, i tried ok, hints at what would cable news would look in a present day Mekkan and how that same modern audience would make out of the show considering it was based on real events and their relation to actual historical figures and ideas of how or what they should be.
There are three things that motivate people: Money, fear and love.
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TheMasterOfOats
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#5 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

:mrgreen: dude I love these. The first one was a very interesting style, and I love how just reading the bulletin entries portrays what the people around it are like. I like how your characters had a sense of personality and the interactions utilized different types of conflict.

The second one was actually hilarious and I was smiling and laughing the whole time. I totally appreciate how you jumped in and out of the show with the side commentary, it definitely adds a brilliant touch.

You honestly don’t give yourself enough credit as a writer, and considering English isn’t your first language it’s still probably better then mine. I’ll be looking forward to your next post.
Image



You’re welcome.
Mr. The master of Oats, master of Oats Canada and Canada Oats, in Oats, Canada.

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Technic[Bot]
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#6 Post by Technic[Bot] »

Oh thanks Mr Oats.
I usually write these only for myself but it is nice to know someone enjoyed them too.
Speaking of that i think i already had written the second part of my first text snippet. May post it later, if i can find it again.

Also: Broken English is the real lingua franca of the world.
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#7 Post by Technic[Bot] »

So I did find the next part of the story on my first post! This one is much more traditional as is is simple prose.
Again it is nothing fancy but its honest job Hope you enjoy it!:
Spoiler! Chapter 2
The four of them turned around and stared silently into the cage. They did not know she could speak their language so well.

Please don't - she sobbed - I haven't done anything wrong. You can't throw me to jail.- At this point she was basically pleading. - “and he… he shot me… I was just passing next to him and he decided to kill me. You are a police, shootings are investigated and prosecuted by default I Have no idea why I am the one being questioned on a cage”. She was clearly upset by this whole ordeal.

“She does have a point “ the policewoman casually added. “You can't be serious” the machinist answered. “This Lupine has read at least some of the law. And well by your own admission you shot her, that is why we are all here. i might need to put you to into custody until we figure this mess out.

“But she broke into my shed and destroyed it on my property. Well the house I rent.”
“You threw me in there after shoot me, it is not my fault that thing was so filmsy it fell apart. Over me!” he young Lupine retorted.
The machinist pointed her and yelled at her “You damn liar this is what I get for trying to help you!” The poor thing simply backed into the corner of her cage as far away from him , and curled up clearly she still feared this man.
The machinist backed off not comfortable antagonizing the girl the guilt of the last night still present on his mind.

“Look no one needs to go to jail “ the doctor interjected. “this is probably just a misunderstanding right? She was probably in town with her family and took a wrong turn somewhere and ended crashing into his shed by accident. And after hearing rhe ruckus our friend here came our of his house gun in hand and probably tripped or something. We all know he is a terrible shot and could not have hit you even if he had tried to. Once he realized you were badly hurt he brought you here to get patched up.”
The Lupine looked down embarrassed at the kindness of this stranger. “My brother tackled him to the ground then the shot went off”
“That is true, besides they were just goofing around they did not wanted to steal anything and I did not wanted to hurt them” the machinist added flatly.
“I know an accidental discharge carries a fine especially if it hits someone but he brought her here officer and will pay for her care. Is that not enough? ” The doctor asked.
“Well legally yes but…” The officer stammered she had no legal reason to hold the Lupine if the machinist did not accused her of robbery. nor she could hold on him for that matter. Not that she cared much about his inept shouting. “ I Guess you are right “

“Oh don't worry she can be a nice wolf and answers our friendly questions right? “ The Lupine nodded. “Well with that crisis averted why don't we open her enclosure so our friend here can stretch her Le…” As soon as she unlocked the door the young Lupine darted outside the cage. Knocking the doctor out of her feet. The officer quickly dived behind the bookcase screaming for her mommy unable to even remember she had a gun. The Lupine was fast and agile she jumped over the table probably trying to reach the nearby Window but she simply fell flat over as she tried to jump over the table whimpering. Her stitches were popping and her bandages began to get bloody.

“Dont move you will hurt yourself “ the vet yelled. But she didn't listen, she keot flalin while the vet tried to restrain her” Until the doctor came and grabbed her arms. “Look you are still hurt, you need to take it easy. You are safe with us we are friends “ Maybe it was her demeanor, her calm and reassuring voice or her resolution, but that managed to calm the young Lupine.

“That is better, let us put you back to bed” She pointed at the machinist and him to carry her back to the enclosure. “You are the strongest of us, the least we handle her the better” The Lupine clearly did not liked the idea but was in no position to argue. The moment he picked her up she simply curled and shook all the way from the table to her little room.

“You are free to go anytime you want, you are no prisoner ” She said while rocking the door back and forth, she was not gonna lock it “ But you won't get far with those wounds “ The Lupine nodded accepted her situation.

“Sure No problem it is not like I need that space” The Lupines room was cobbled together in one corner of the vet clinic occupying a significant space. “Sorry I really, really wish I would not be here. And you have been kind too if you need the space I can leave now” The Lupine sighed in defeat, she might had to sleep in the rough a few nights…

“Sorry that is not what I meant, it was just a bad joke, please stay as long as you need, after all you have someone paying for you” The vet smirked at the machinist he simply shrugged

“Thank you “ She smiled, despite the fangs and the bandages she had cute smile.
“now stay still for a moment while we check your stitches we do not want you to bleed out after all that work right?”
“And please don't bite us”
“ Why would i Do that?” She asked a bit confused….
It is significantly smaller than chapter 1 but. Believe it or not it took me around a week to finish!
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#8 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

Hey, this is good! It’s a nice ending to the story but also has a plot of its own. The plot is very interesting, I like the future-Mekkan you’ve built.
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#9 Post by Technic[Bot] »

Well the Mekkan news story is actually two kinds fan-fiction but the last one is actually original fiction.
Although it is inspired by two kinds.
But since I posted everything here in no particular order I am not surprised it all got confusing. I should refactor this some day. Al least give the thing a proper title.

As a last note my story is supposed to take place in a late 1890 early 1910's age. So not quite modern by today's standards
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#10 Post by Technic[Bot] »

Well I had this idea the other day and after a while decided to give it a go. It is a short detective story but also Twokinds fan-fiction.
Per forum policy when in doubt tag as NSFW. It is no more graphic than your run of the mill law an order episode. But if you are queasy about blood i would suggest skipping this:
Spoiler! Muder mistery story (Warning blood)
You know I liked this hotel. The detective mentioned. But now with this damn mess I doubt i will ever come here again.
Why? His partner asked
I do not like sleeping where i work. He sentenced.

Welcome detectives!. The young keidran officer chimed. She was green,
a couple years off the academy but her heart was in the rigth place.

What do we have here Aileen?

Oh yes let me see- She fumbled across her clipboard. Victim, female wolf,
young adult, multiple stab wounds to-

Where is the body? The older detective interjected. We were told this was a murder

No, at least not yet. One of the maids heard her asking from help and unlocked the
door. She was then taken to the hospital, still breathing.

They walked into the crime scene. It was a simple bedroom but a nice one at that the only indication that something really wrong happened there was the police cordons around the area.
This was not the cheap capsules they had on first floor but was not the presidential suite either. It had a double bed with red sheets, an open, a mostly empty minibar and a small desk with a computer on it, still on but locked. The bathroom was spacious you could fit a couple on the bathtub if you wanted to.
The only thing out of the ordinary was the bloodstain at the feet of the bed where the victim laid no so long ago. And the trail she left when she crawled across the room to ask for help.

The detectives kneeled near the the stain to give it a closer look, something was not right. How many stabs did you mention? The older detective asked

Let me see… The hospital is still counting but at least 7 to the torso. Both detectives turned toward the officer, confusion clear on their faces. Where is the rest of the blood?

Pa.. Pardon? the officer stammered.

The blood, you do not take seven to the chest and leave just this puddle. And there is a distinct lack of knife splat patterns around.

I did… I do not know that is how everything was when we got called.. I .. I… secured the place properly…

Just a couple months ago officer Aileen failed to secure a crime scene properly and the murder weapon got lost. The guy almost walked. They were about to fire her but since there were no more recruits to replace her they could not let her go.

Relax kiddo. It is not like they could swipe up the blood from the room. Beside you got Sanchez and Ahmed helping you this time. The younger detective comforted her, still they had a point. This looked like a bizarre kitchen accident not an attempted murder.

So who is the victim?

Hospital did not found any ID on her but we found an this on the room. She produced a small plastic card. Oliver Miller, Male, lupine, around the age of the victim.

Probably the boyfriend. The older detective said
You do know that statistically most women are killed by their partner right? The older detective idly mentioned.
Re… Really? Aileen asked in shock
Do not get him started kid, you know he will never shut up if he does.
Sorry…

Got a Letter. The older detective had gone to the room’s desk a grabbed a small piece of paper from it. He proceeded to read it out loud.
Darling In back in town again… yada yada yada…. Been missing you a lot… Bla bla bla … Want to have you betwe… Erm… Ok that is of no use for our investigation… Sincerely Oliver Miller.
So the guy was her boyfriend after all. Go figures

So what is the hypothesis here? Girl comes to see his boyfriend they have an argument about something and the guy decides to turn her into a shish-kebab?
Would not be the first nor the last . Aileen simply gasped at the idea.

Uhmm… The maid mentioned the door was locked from the inside they had to call management with the master key to unlock it. The room has no other entrances, not to mention we are on the 5th floor. I have been discussing theories with Sanchez but this does not make sense. From behind the door Sanchez grunted in agreement.


So what did you saw? The young detective asked the maid.

She was there and . Oh my god the smell! If i had not heard her-- The vixen closed her eyes and began to sob. Aileen always hated taking notes with the detective, she was not good with people. Besides the detectives did not allow he to do the asking she was just there to take notes.
But you were and she may live thanks to you- The detective placed a hand on her shoulder to comfort her- But we need to know what else you saw.
Once we opened the door she was…- The maid drew a big breath- Bleeding, her shirt and … and her ... undergarments were torn apart all covered in blood. Then I… I fainted...
The maid turned away from the cops embarrassed at herself. She wanted to help but could not do much more.
The detective sighed. Anything else that struck you as out of the ordinary on her? besides the blood I mean?
It looked to me she tore them off herself. Her clothes I mean and she still wearing pants… Oh come on why do I only remember stupid stuff?!
Relax it is ok, you did all you could. Aileen tried to comfort the maid. The detective was surprised at her intervention, she was not supposed to talk, but he simply nodded in agreement.


So you tell me the guy Oliver was the one who rented the room not the victim we found?
Yes. the managers replied almost in unison both fox Keidran one yellow and one orange. The older detective had the not so glamorous job of interviewing the hotel owners.

So this Oliver guy was a regular?
We had seen Mr Miller a couple of times before. but he was always a quiet man when in the city and an avid drinker but never gave any problems. He leaves early to attend his business and returns late, drinks a few beer at the restaurant and leaves to his room. Maids said his room was never messy not dirty. And turns out he kills his gal here...

Did you know why he was on town?
Guy Never told us and we do not like to pry on the guests affairs.
He did mention his girlfriend i think. The orange vixen mentioned.

The other Kiedran sighed profusely and slumped on a chair.
What are we gonna do? A murder at our Hotel, we are gonna get closed down. And if for some miracle the government does not shut down this place. Who wants to stay at a hotel where someone got killed?
What is gonna happen to our employees? They have families to support!
Do not forget about us, the orange vixen added, it is not like we have massive piles of cash saved around in case the Hotel goes under. We will probably have to go back to our home town and work as farmers or something…

Well the girl is not dead yet. The detective drily mentioned. Besides there is a lot of weird people who actually like to stay in places with stories like these.
Really? The foxes asked in unison.
Do not underestimate people stupidity.



And then again they sent me where I could cause no more trouble... Aileen thought to herself she was “collecting evidence” and securing the 8th floor. At least that is what was gonna appear on her report.

It was an accident, just one time… Ever since the incident a couple months ago the detectives send her to do useless chores anytime they wanted her out of their way. Probably afraid she will botch another crime scene. So she was stuck 3 floors above the real crime “sweeping the area” As if the perpetrator was not in another country already. And on top of that:

This case makes no damn sense! She thought
The door was closed from the inside, no one saw that woman enter the building nor the boyfriend leaving. Forensics team says no teleportation or magic was detected. And more than half the blood she lost is missing!

The it hit her a weird smell. She was no stranger to her nose getting overwhelmed on a construction zone, all the materials and chemicals used had that effect. But this was something else, something organic?

She was technically on patrol so she decided to follow the smell, the place layout was a mess, yet her nose carried her through the maze of half built rooms. The smell more and more present with every step. A strong smell of chlorine filled the air but something else was also there. And after entering a soon to be bathroom she found the source…

So I am telling you this sandwich joint is the best i have seen in a while. We should go sometime. The detectives were on their way to collect Aileen, idly chatting along the way. After some hours they decided to wrap it up and continue at the precinct.

Aaaaahhhh!

Just after they left the ladder shaft they clearly hear Aileen scream. Was the guy hiding here all along? If so they had sent the young officer to the guys clutches.
Both detectives drew their guns and ran to help. She might be incompetent but she did not deserved being killed.

Shortly later they found her Aileen was on the floor, scared but otherwise unharmed. You ok? The older detective asked.
Yes… I… I found the missing blood. Both detectives turned around and were welcomed with a ghastly sight.

The not yet finished bathtub was covered in blood and splats patterns covered all the unfinished lavatory. The walls and the floor


So a second crime scene then? Negative sir, the forensics guy replied, preliminary tests show same blood type as the victim a fe floors below.
They had to set up a second cordoned area next to the unfinished bathroom. Despite the blood everywhere there was some method in the madness. The guy set up a plastic curtain behind the bathtub which keep most of the rest of the room clean there were also signs he tried to clean it up. A bloodied rag was next to the bathtub and a container of chlorine was opened next to it half empty, some of it poured into the tub.
Someone must have interrupted him before he finished cleaning up. Management says some of the buildiers came last minute to finish the plumbing the other side of the floor before tomorrow's holiday. The other detective said.
But how did he do it? did he stabbed the gal remotely? His partner retorted. They could not tell now, the forensic technician that handled all the magic nonsense had already left and they could not send another one until tomorrow.

I think i recognize that rag. Aileen interrupted. One of the detectives picked it with a pen. It was not a rag, it was some sort of vest, undone and bloody. Considering the amount of fabric available at scene it was curious the killer decided to use that clean up.

That is a “compression vest” like the one Rosy uses! Aileen exclaimed
And what is that? the younger detective asked.
Uhmm… It is a magic trinket, like a bag of holding but for oneself. Some of the girls in the squad use to keep their… Assets… out of the way while on patrol. You … can buy them online. The young officer now was blushing.
Sure we can have this type of conversation without getting HR all riled up? The older detective asked. He had a point, it might be work related but discussing the breasts of other officers with someone 20 years her junior did not sound really good no matter how you put it.

Wait, that is not normal. Aileen took a closer look at the vest, it was not the cheap 20 bucks version you buy online. This seemed custom made, looked like linen instead of polyester and was way more ornate than what she had seen before. And although she was not very magically gifted herself she could sense the enchantment more was refined than the cheap version.

That’s it! She exclaimed. That is how the killer got him!.
What are you talking about? The detectives asked her. If anything this makes less sense now.

You do not get it. Oliver Miller is not the boyfriend he is the victim!
Ok Kiddo don’t get ahead of yourself. Why do you think that and what that has anything to do with the vest.
This is a custom made. People sometimes link together several bag of holdings to the same place and you can to the same with these vest! For ummm… reasons! She knew exactly why people did that but was not about to explain that to her superiors

The perpetrator probably found the pair and come to the hotel. When he was sure the victim was alone in his room he came here set this place up and stabbed him through the vest. All the blood then poured from it into the room. But the victim managed to tear the vest apart before he died! The detectives had never seen Aileen this excited, she was usually quiet and brooding. A nice change in their opinion.

Call central, tell them we need that fancy-pants mage consultant that charges twice my salary ASAP. One of the detectives barked at the rest of the officers.
Good job kiddo. The other said while patting the young officer in the back.

Also per custom I am explaining what i just wrote
Spoiler!
Am I the only one who things Nat magic bindings pose some serious security issues? I anyone is to find any of the linked bindings it is trivial to hurt Nat using them. So i decided to create a small murder mystery based on that premise. Originally it was gonna be from the assasin perspective. But changed to the policemen point of view.
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#11 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

You make a very good point. Nat’s Security flaws are mocked often in sketches.

Also good story, very intriguing.
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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#12 Post by Yastreb »

I liked the story, but it would be easier to read if the lines spoken by characters were marked in some way, such as quotation marks.

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Re: Technic[bot]'s literary corner

#13 Post by Technic[Bot] »

Yastreb wrote: Wed Aug 12, 2020 4:28 pm I liked the story, but it would be easier to read if the lines spoken by characters were marked in some way, such as quotation marks.
Yeah I know. As I said not much of a writer myself and I have a particular hard time writing dialogues. And I know it shows.
I will try to fix it sometime in the future :/
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