Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves [Mature Content]

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Warrl
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#301 Post by Warrl »

Daniel is correct - that went QUITE well.

Perhaps the two most important things that happened are that the humans saw a lupasad slap down another lupasad who was getting overly hostile, and the lupasad saw humans subtly rebuke another human by turning discussion from why something couldn't be done at all to what could be done and how to do it.

Getting the list of demands is also important, but in the long run I think this meeting could have been considered a success even if it only paved the way to a second meeting where the lists of demands got built.

So the lupasad demands are beyond the authority of the governor, while the humans' demands are something the lupasad leadership will never agree to - big deal. There must be a starting point for negotiation, or there will never be an agreement. And of course each side should be asking for more than it expects to get while offering less than it expects to have to give - but with an idea of how to negotiate from that opening position to an acceptable conclusion.

The impossible demands? That can be dealt with - once the demands are made, counterproposals can be extended and discussions can occur on what is possible and what it would take to do it.

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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#302 Post by Bellhead »

I kinda figured Frank might do something like that.

And considering to where the Sons are coming from, I'd say things went about as well as they could have.

Jakob's certainly got his work cut out for him. Changing the entire Monarchy? Sound like Tuesday. Seriously, though... This will be VERY interesting to see.
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#303 Post by FrogSteaks »

Gah, I've been slipping on replies to chapters recently, sorry 'bout that. I'm still reading I promise.

Okay, that was probably the best conclusion that one could hope for regarding the negotiations. Having Tholmes and the Sons in the same room at the same time? That could have easily gone south, really fast.

Now it's just a matter of whether or not the two sides can come to some kind of compromise. Right now, given the demands, it appears it's going to be quite difficult.

Also, I'm sort of curious if there's actually something between Daniel and Halil...
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#304 Post by Bellhead »

FrogSteaks wrote:Also, I'm sort of curious if there's actually something between Daniel and Halil...
I don't see how there wouldn't be. I mean, two people showering together is pretty personal, even if it is just a shower.

Though I could easilly see Jakob telling Zyanya and them trying it sometime, I think the more likely outcome of that scene is that Jakob will end up talking to them, and maybe telling them about his own secret love.. I could definately see him telling them as a sign of trust, a sort of "I won't tell if you don't" sort of thing, but then again, that's not really his style. But nor is seeing a friend, or two for that matter, live in fear because of their happiness.

Come to think of it, I'd actually like to know how the three of them handle this. It's quite an interesting side-plot to be worried about 3 hours after I usually hit the sack. :P Times like this I really wish I had an illuminated keyboard...
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#305 Post by amenon »

Caught up the last two chapters. Don't really have much to say. Jakob waffling with his health continues to feel a little silly. It also feels like they're getting increasingly lax with keeping their secrets, which might suggest they'll out sooner rather than later. Okay overall. Nice last line.

Didn't have my typowatch eyes on this time, but:
- A pretty awkward sentence: "His throat had been feeling tight since he even arrived at the funeral, and it took a few moments to compose himself."
- An actual typo: "I’m sorry to hear about what happened your father"
FrogSteaks wrote:Also, I'm sort of curious if there's actually something between Daniel and Halil...
Get on my level :P
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#306 Post by NinjaWithAStick »

You know, I've always been curious how to properly pronounce "Lupusad".
And that's just my walking stick...
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#307 Post by FrogSteaks »

NinjaWithAStick wrote:You know, I've always been curious how to properly pronounce "Lupusad".
This discussion came up a while ago...
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#308 Post by Jonesy »

NinjaWithAStick wrote:You know, I've always been curious how to properly pronounce "Lupusad".
Loo-puh-sahd.
amenon wrote:Caught up the last two chapters. Don't really have much to say. Jakob waffling with his health continues to feel a little silly. It also feels like they're getting increasingly lax with keeping their secrets, which might suggest they'll out sooner rather than later. Okay overall. Nice last line.

Didn't have my typowatch eyes on this time, but:
- A pretty awkward sentence: "His throat had been feeling tight since he even arrived at the funeral, and it took a few moments to compose himself."
- An actual typo: "I’m sorry to hear about what happened your father"
FrogSteaks wrote:Also, I'm sort of curious if there's actually something between Daniel and Halil...
Get on my level :P
Is the quality of my writing declining, or something? Because you haven't had a lot of good things to say about the story for a while now.

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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#309 Post by amenon »

Jonesy wrote:Is the quality of my writing declining, or something? Because you haven't had a lot of good things to say about the story for a while now.
You shouldn't read too much into it. I'm pretty sure your prose keeps improving, and I'd guess my rate of complaints has been in swifter decline than the rate of compliments. I've been becoming less engaged, and some of that may have to do with the story -- you might be telegraphing the good end too hard, whether it turns out that way or not -- but most of it is just me. For one, it's now been a pretty long time since I started reading, so a lot has passed out of memory; each chapter is a more disconnected experience. If you're making callbacks, for instance, I'm probably missing them. For another, my mood hasn't been what it used to be, and that's going to affect both my enjoyment, and my enthusiasm for providing feedback.

I don't think you're in decline.
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 29) [Mature Content]

#310 Post by Bellhead »

Nor do I. This is by far my favorite story on these forums, and I definately agree that your skills have been constantly improving.
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 30) [Mature Content]

#311 Post by Jonesy »

As planned, the time has finally come to take the story down for now, in preparation for future publishing of the re-written version. It's a pretty bittersweet moment; I've got a lot of great memories about uploading chapters and eagerly anticipating people's responses. I'd like to thank you all for following the story all these years, and I'm glad you enjoyed it so much. I'll be keeping the thread itself up for now in order to keep you all updated on where H&L goes from here.​

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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 30) [Mature Content]

#312 Post by Bellhead »

And so ends another relaxing night with the happy couples. What are we up to now? Three taboo relationships with one in the making? :P

Daniel and Halil seem a bit touchy-feely in front of Jakob, considering that he saw them together not two days ago.. But then again, they seem to care about each other an awful lot, and I would probably chalk it up to Daniel's friendship and comfort with Jakob that let it get that.. affectionate.

Also, it's nice to see that negotiations are gaining momentum in the Kingsley household, if nowhere else. Friggin' Frank.. His ideas of impossible demands sure seem like pipe dreams, but only to those without the drive for change.

Sorry I couldn't read this sooner. Juggling school and work is not easy.
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 30) [Mature Content]

#313 Post by amenon »

Jonesy wrote:
Chapter 30 - Affirmations
Solid chapter!
  • No points for Jakob for getting so pissy with Tholmes. Franklyn came out of that exchange looking better.
  • I seem to have forgotten why Daniel and Halil are camped out at the Kingsleys. Was there some sort of permanent reason?
  • The Daniel and Jakob discussion is on point. "I couldn't help but feel that we somehow understood each other."
  • Jakob/Rakai recap feels a bit clumsy. Should probably be in chronological sequence in the story?
  • I don't think '100%' has any place in dialogue, or at least this dialogue. 'All the way' or something. At a minimum, 'a hundred percent'. (Or is it one hundred percent? Anyway.)
  • The next stage in shipping: Richard and Magena. H&L The Next Generation is shaping up!
  • Also seem to have forgotten what happened with Kasa's parents. I guess they got harassed, and this was established when we met them at Jessamine's place? [But at a blind guess, 'what happened TO my parents' might be better than 'what happened WITH my parents'] [[And there's the explanations, a bit later! Did we already know this? If yes, then ok with the previous reservation about 'with my parents'; if no, then I think the whole line needs to change to something that doesn't imply previous knowledge.]]
  • "Nothing needed to come of it." seems a little odd, when it doesn't seem expected that anything WOULD come of it (since Zyanya is not in estrus) [Hoping for a bit of semi-platonic sleeping together and talking and cuddling and all that good stuff, though!]
  • "Well, I’m glad we were able to catch up a little." It's not catching up if they're meeting for the first time!
  • Isaac and Tala, too! There must be something in the air. Or the water. Or those coookies...
  • Could I possibly be detecting a me-influence in that shower speculation aside? :P (Though, I guess this was probably already at the proofers before you took me up.)
  • Guess I'll take a Jakob and Zyanya moment!
Spoiler!
- How can you force her to be the only one her kind in the world?
- By the time they had spoke
- Better to talk it out and be taken seriously that than join the Sons and get shot.
- "everyone’s cheers up" Feels wrong to me. Everyone's spirits up?
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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 30) [Mature Content]

#314 Post by Jonesy »

Bellhead wrote:And so ends another relaxing night with the happy couples. What are we up to now? Three taboo relationships with one in the making? :P
*two
amenon wrote:The next stage in shipping: Richard and Magena. H&L The Next Generation is shaping up!
amenon wrote:I seem to have forgotten why Daniel and Halil are camped out at the Kingsleys. Was there some sort of permanent reason?
They moved into one of the guest rooms so they could assist Jakob more readily. In actuality, it mostly an excuse to get a room to themselves.
amenon wrote:Also seem to have forgotten what happened with Kasa's parents. I guess they got harassed, and this was established when we met them at Jessamine's place? [But at a blind guess, 'what happened TO my parents' might be better than 'what happened WITH my parents'] [[And there's the explanations, a bit later! Did we already know this? If yes, then ok with the previous reservation about 'with my parents'; if no, then I think the whole line needs to change to something that doesn't imply previous knowledge.]]
We already knew this. Jakob learned of it when he stopped by on his way home from hospital, but Zyanya didn't have complete knowledge of it.

This was only a couple of chapters ago, dude.
amenon wrote:Could I possibly be detecting a me-influence in that shower speculation aside? :P (Though, I guess this was probably already at the proofers before you took me up.)
Mebbe.

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Re: Human & Lupusad - Of Men and Wolves (Current Chapter: 30) [Mature Content]

#315 Post by Bachaddict »

Just a reply to say I don't have a lot of feedback but enjoyed the chapter!
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