Silverlocks 11 [in progress][DEFINITELY NSFW]

Post all your stories, poems, and haiku's here!

Moderator: Moderators

Message
Author
Citizen
Posts: 65
Joined: Mon May 25, 2020 11:16 pm
Location: Canada
Favorite Character: Florence Ambrose

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][probably NSFW, idk]

#16 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

Technic[Bot] wrote:
Thu Jul 23, 2020 3:53 am
And regarding the fourth:
Amirite? Is that and invented word? If so how did you come up with it? Sorry I have a curious interest on synthetic languages and terms.
Also I think Nat worries seems a bit out of proportion. You know her plan but for what I gather Raine asked her to pretend to be a sex slave not to a to actually... Uhm... Do any real sex work right?
Thought I imagine Natani personal hell is being a sex-slave. On one hand he is forced to be and act female and on the other she has absolutely no agency about it.
Finally I think if I remember correctly Keidran are not fertile all year round so natani has no risk of conception.
All valid points. Yes, I did make up the word “àm’ridge”. I have no clue what it means. I can up with it at midnight while I was sweating in my west-facing, non-air-conditioned upstairs bedroom. It was probably a hallucination, now that I think about it.

As for your points about Natani: I get what you’re saying. While I can chalk that up to hyperbole for the story’s sake, I’d be lying. In the comic, both Natani and Zen (specifically Nat) are portrayed as prudish. In my opinion, Natani’s frightened of a) sex and b) people both knowing and using her female body. And you are correct: Natani can’t actually get preggers at this point in the story. If you read other stories (specifically NSFW ones) most writers don’t note that fact. It’s hilarious because I always laugh when people write like that, but it sets such a precedent that I went along with it.

I guess I’m just an idiot.
Image






You’re welcome.

User avatar
Templar Inner Circle
Posts: 3232
Joined: Wed Oct 23, 2013 11:17 pm
Location: The high country of the mind.
Favorite Character: Keith and Natani

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][probably NSFW, idk]

#17 Post by Bellhead »

TheMasterOfOats wrote:
Thu Jul 23, 2020 6:02 am
Technic[Bot] wrote:
Thu Jul 23, 2020 3:53 am
Amirite? Is that an invented word? If so how did you come up with it? Sorry I have a curious interest on synthetic languages and terms.
Yes, I did make up the word “àm’ridge”. I have no clue what it means. I can up with it at midnight while I was sweating in my west-facing, non-air-conditioned upstairs bedroom. It was probably a hallucination, now that I think about it.
I think Technic was referring to amirite, as in "Am I Right", but eh.

Now about the pregnancy issue. Keidran pregnancy is an issue commonly known by keidran and traders, for obvious reasons, but would Raine know about it? Better still, would Natani care about whether or not it was possible? He'd be far more concerned with whether it would, than if it could, in my mind. Kind of like being afraid of Martians at the supermarket, you'd be more afraid that it might happen, than concerned about whether or not it's actually possible.
Gearhead in the digital world, who will probably grow up to be a very grumpy old man.

Citizen
Posts: 65
Joined: Mon May 25, 2020 11:16 pm
Location: Canada
Favorite Character: Florence Ambrose

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][probably NSFW, idk]

#18 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

Bellhead wrote:
Thu Jul 23, 2020 11:08 am
TheMasterOfOats wrote:
Thu Jul 23, 2020 6:02 am
Technic[Bot] wrote:
Thu Jul 23, 2020 3:53 am
Amirite? Is that an invented word? If so how did you come up with it? Sorry I have a curious interest on synthetic languages and terms.
Yes, I did make up the word “àm’ridge”. I have no clue what it means. I can up with it at midnight while I was sweating in my west-facing, non-air-conditioned upstairs bedroom. It was probably a hallucination, now that I think about it.
I think Technic was referring to amirite, as in "Am I Right", but eh.

Now about the pregnancy issue. Keidran pregnancy is an issue commonly known by keidran and traders, for obvious reasons, but would Raine know about it? Better still, would Natani care about whether or not it was possible? He'd be far more concerned with whether it would, than if it could, in my mind. Kind of like being afraid of Martians at the supermarket, you'd be more afraid that it might happen, than concerned about whether or not it's actually possible.
I thought “amirite” too, but then I realized I haven’t actually used it at all in this thread. I figured “àm’ridge” because it was about the same length, and shared some common letters.

And I think you’re right about Natani’s stance on pregnancy.
Image






You’re welcome.

User avatar
Templar GrandMaster
Posts: 654
Joined: Sat Jan 27, 2018 9:48 pm
Location: México
Contact:

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][probably NSFW, idk]

#19 Post by Technic[Bot] »

I said amirite because I am writing this on mobile and it is already hard enough writing non ASCII characters with a keyboard. There was no way I could write that on my phone. I simply assumed amirite would get the point across.

Also had not thought about Mr bellhead point. Regardless if even possible I imagine the idea of pregnancy unwanted or otherwise will scare Natani.
There are three things that motivate people: Money, fear and love.
Links to my ramblings:
Twokinds [of] data
PhpBB in the age of facebook

Citizen
Posts: 65
Joined: Mon May 25, 2020 11:16 pm
Location: Canada
Favorite Character: Florence Ambrose

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][probably NSFW, idk]

#20 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

Chapter 5 is up! Funnily enough, this is starting to become "Natani's 11". After chapter 6, it'll probably correct back to Raine as the main character.
Image






You’re welcome.

User avatar
Templar GrandMaster
Posts: 654
Joined: Sat Jan 27, 2018 9:48 pm
Location: México
Contact:

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][probably NSFW, idk]

#21 Post by Technic[Bot] »

TheMasterOfOats wrote:
Thu Jul 30, 2020 9:31 pm
Chapter 5 is up! Funnily enough, this is starting to become "Natani's 11". After chapter 6, it'll probably correct back to Raine as the main character.
Is that a reference two ocean eleven?

Anyhow I hate to be that guy. But of something pierced your body your really shouldn't take it out. Most of the time the thing is keeping your from bleeding out.
And also I am counter my own argument by saying that a small shard of glass is unlike to cause too much trouble unless is in an artery or something like that. But still you are gonna make a bloody mess.

On a final note is Raine ok? I understand he starved and dehydrated out of guilt and depression but she seems to have some really severe sequels. Those crippling migraines and fainting is not nornal. I am no doctor by any means but that sounds like a stroke waiting to happen.
There are three things that motivate people: Money, fear and love.
Links to my ramblings:
Twokinds [of] data
PhpBB in the age of facebook

Citizen
Posts: 65
Joined: Mon May 25, 2020 11:16 pm
Location: Canada
Favorite Character: Florence Ambrose

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][probably NSFW, idk]

#22 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

Technic[Bot] wrote:
Fri Jul 31, 2020 3:44 am

Is that a reference two ocean eleven?

Anyhow I hate to be that guy. But of something pierced your body your really shouldn't take it out. Most of the time the thing is keeping your from bleeding out.
And also I am counter my own argument by saying that a small shard of glass is unlike to cause too much trouble unless is in an artery or something like that. But still you are gonna make a bloody mess.

On a final note is Raine ok? I understand he starved and dehydrated out of guilt and depression but she seems to have some really severe sequels. Those crippling migraines and fainting is not nornal. I am no doctor by any means but that sounds like a stroke waiting to happen.
Yep, that’s an Oceans reference. (They were all great except for 8. It was ok)

And while I am also not a medical professional, I wasn’t sure how to continue with the glass. If Natani has left it in, that could have required her bring Maeve downstairs, lest she seem like a jerk. I think I mentioned it was a small piece of glass, and were it one singular, small shard I’d personally take my chances removing it. You do raise a fair point though: it’s not a great idea to pull glass out of wounds.

As for Raine, I expect she’ll be ok. I know a guy who would frequently get migraines (at least once a week), and they consistently ended with him blacking out and later throwing up. While his were caused in part by a sensitivity to components in processed meats, I figured anorexia and dehydration would have similar consequences. Combine that with the sheer amount of severe head trauma she’s experienced over the course of the story and in my opinion, it’s only a slight hyperbole.

Thanks for the tips though, I’ll keep that in mind.
Image






You’re welcome.

Citizen
Posts: 65
Joined: Mon May 25, 2020 11:16 pm
Location: Canada
Favorite Character: Florence Ambrose

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][DEFINITELY NSFW]

#23 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

Heads up, chapter 6 is available. And it get's gross.

unless you're into people's balls getting burst. Then you're good.
Image






You’re welcome.

User avatar
Templar Inner Circle
Posts: 3232
Joined: Wed Oct 23, 2013 11:17 pm
Location: The high country of the mind.
Favorite Character: Keith and Natani

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][DEFINITELY NSFW]

#24 Post by Bellhead »

That was.. disturbing. You weren't kidding. It's almost scary how well you set the scene in there...

Glad he made it out, though. Hope Trace and Flora will be okay.
Gearhead in the digital world, who will probably grow up to be a very grumpy old man.

User avatar
Templar GrandMaster
Posts: 654
Joined: Sat Jan 27, 2018 9:48 pm
Location: México
Contact:

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][DEFINITELY NSFW]

#25 Post by Technic[Bot] »

I see you went... Places

Just as a note I think those kind of wounds are a bit more severe than what you make it look. The area is heavily vascularized so it is actually hard not cut some important vein and had the guy bleed out...
There are three things that motivate people: Money, fear and love.
Links to my ramblings:
Twokinds [of] data
PhpBB in the age of facebook

Citizen
Posts: 65
Joined: Mon May 25, 2020 11:16 pm
Location: Canada
Favorite Character: Florence Ambrose

Re: Silverlocks 11 [in progress][DEFINITELY NSFW]

#26 Post by TheMasterOfOats »

Technic[Bot] wrote:
Wed Aug 05, 2020 3:26 am
I see you went... Places
Bellhead wrote:
Wed Aug 05, 2020 12:36 am
That was.. disturbing.
Yeah... I’m not too proud of some of it.

It went from an Ocean’s movie to Taken with a hint of Mississippi Burning (the part with the “specialist” where he threatens to cut the guys nuts off).
A slight departure from my usual retarded comedy.
Image






You’re welcome.

Post Reply