Corrupt a Wish

[InceptionBwaaa]

Granted, but why not-wishing causes a ripple in spacetime and suddenly 10,000 dorra is not enough to repay your debts.

I wish I could win the Bloodsport.

[kellade]

Granted. You loose your leg in the process.
I wish for an extra hour in the ball pit.

[InceptionBwaaa]

Granted, but you get lost in the pit and eventually resurface on the other side, i.e. a frozen lake in Narnia. You find yourself on a quest to stop a scheming lion and four brats without parents while the true Queen reqards you with delicious Turkish Delights.

I wish for the White Phial, filled with root beer-infused health potion.

[kellade]

Granted. But root beer sadly doesn't mix chemically well health potion, so it asplodes, breaking the White Phial.
I wish for Him x Mr.Wolf to be cannon.

[Him]

Granted, but the story gets solely focused on the shipping and it takes a turn for the worst. Also, all the porn...

I wish I was better at writing stories.

[InceptionBwaaa]

They're written in Keidran. Not even you can understand them.

I wish for working PS4 controllers!

[Sharkson]

Granted. Your PS4 breaks just as you get them working, however.

I wish I had a giant wizard hat.

[triman95]

Granted, but now every adventurer and adventuring party want you to join them on a epic quest or really dangerous dungeons and a very powerful recurring evil wizard or warrior will come to try and kill you every now and again and making bad puns when doing so.

I wish to be a Dictator of Tropico

[Sharkson]

Granted. You're now on trial in international court for human rights violations.

I wish I had some semblance of swordsmanship.

[Him]

Granted, you challenge a man to a duel and die a painful death. You're swordsmanship skills were inadequate.

I wish I could clean the blood off of my saber.

[jacobc62]

Granted, but you cut off your hand..... And there wasn't any blood on it to begin with because it's a Lightsaber.

I wish people would quit eating my Pops cereal!

[kellade]

Granted, but your Pops declares that it's an independent cereal who don't need no man and floats off into space.
I wish stars could be walked upon.

[InceptionBwaaa]

Granted, but only by Gingerians.

I wish for some kind of indestructible Necromorph to fight, be it the one from Dead Space 1, 2, or 3.

[Sharkson]

Granted. It's indestructible. You die.

I wish I had access to faster-than-light travel.

[InceptionBwaaa]

Granted, but it's only theoretical.

I wish for the laws of the universe to be rewritten by a cat.