Sigh.. Making me feel old... There is no smile from that. Boooo!minime wrote:Why are you jealous, i'm 19 and never even had a real friend, i've had no shot at a relationship no matter how hard i trieddartvader48 wrote:god, i think im jealous, im still single and im 17, maybe i do need to live a lonely life
(pss... should i get a girl soon?)
Besides, 17 is a young age
I lived through that age, I was a computer geek into comics and RPG's. Not too much lady action in those hobbies let me tell you.
I started hanging out with OTHER geeks, all computer ones. I joined BBS's to play games and met more friends (Try using 300 baud dial up and then complain about slow internet to me...).
My groups of friends did indeed grow and shrink over the years. My oldest friends that I STILL to this day play online with occassionally are ones I made in high school 25 years ago.
The key to pretty much anything is self confidence. Never be afraid to fail. However hunting specifically for the purpose of a long term relationship seems counterproductive to me.
Talk to the clerks at the variety store. Start by saying hi, thank you, ask about something/help for something.
I've had 2 true girlfriends over the years in any meaningful relationships. Both started our as nothing more than talking as part of a group of friends. The last one I met in 1992 by hanging out with my friends and through them her brother. We started actually going out solo (dating) in 1993, and we married in 2000. So I'm a tad oldschool I guess since we dated for 7 years; and happily we are still together today. That memory brings a smile to my face.
The biggest challenges you will ever mentally face is from your own ability to overcome failure and rejection.
An old friend told me once that he went clubbing to pick up women. For every 15 he asked, there was one who said yes. (He's still single BTW, wonder why...)
I can tell you truly however, self confidence in the ability to do something and accept whatever the result is is something I wish I would have known through high school.
Never be afraid to just talk to people. Don't look at them as if they are GF material, just talk to them as though they were anyone else.
Join an anime club/art class/RPG group at a local games/comic/rpg store. Something to get you out of the house. One of the other big things is to find a job, even part time, to ensure you have social interaction at a face to face level. Find a local club/group of some sort and go to a gathering. No one will ever get to know you personally if you don't talk to them.
Face to face means a physical presence and on the spot communication, which for some can be a huge issue.
Simple guidelines.
Never be afraid to make a mistake. Mistakes allow us to learn and grow. Example: Short out the computer motherboard by dropping a screw on it when it was powered up?
Never be afraid to ask for help. Somethings you cannot do alone, or know how to do. Example: Asking someone for directions because you are lost?
Never be afraid to start over. Ask for forgiveness/do over/second chance/etc... Example: Did you come across as an [censored] without knowing it when you first talked to someone?
Never be afraid of things you have no control over. Accept it and move on. Example: That woman you like, goes and dates one of your friends instead...
(I am speaking from experience in all of these things)
I never really found myself, who I was comfortable being; until I was in my mid 20's. The joy of being young is that you get to discover who you are. At 17 and 19, you are just beginning.
Of course this is my personal opinion. Take it for what it is.
I'm just lucky to find mine! Not sure exactly how, I am terrible at communicating with people and opening up to them.
